Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bar mat shot.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize