I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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