Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
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