and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize