honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize