just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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