woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize