Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.

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  (305): I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it. http://tfl.nu/u417
  Replies (5) Good night (1565) Bad night (639) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"

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  (908): Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings" http://tfl.nu/7jzd
  Replies (29) Good night (2904) Bad night (489) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Where you at

  (1-917): View more from New York City

  assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?

  (917): View more from New York City

  Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.

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  (917): Where you at (1-917): assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup? (917): Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed. http://tfl.nu/v1xe
  Replies (7) Good night (660) Bad night (2603)
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  (415): View more from California

  It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.

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  (415): It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year. http://tfl.nu/fhgz
  Replies (19) Good night (5761) Bad night (1220) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.

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  (585): Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either. http://tfl.nu/3i4x
  Replies (12) Good night (7677) Bad night (746) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?

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  (937): He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst? http://tfl.nu/5xe1
  Replies (67) Good night (1526) Bad night (25590) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  Why was I handcuffed to the roof?

  (518): View more from New York

  It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly

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  (585): Why was I handcuffed to the roof? (518): It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly http://tfl.nu/nk88
  Replies (27) Good night (9132) Bad night (1031)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back

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  (+44): Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back http://tfl.nu/tdhe
  Replies (12) Good night (805) Bad night (4424) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?

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  (513): I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means? http://tfl.nu/ni5g
  Replies (12) Good night (3977) Bad night (847) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick

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  (215): did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick http://tfl.nu/zk1d
  Replies (5) Good night (900) Bad night (2174) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished

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  (415): He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished http://tfl.nu/a96t
  Replies (7) Good night (2333) Bad night (454)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually

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  (931): i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually http://tfl.nu/wdhn
  Replies (3) Good night (928) Bad night (444) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...

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  (402): Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem... http://tfl.nu/aasf
  Replies (2) Good night (614) Bad night (167) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.

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  (720): You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero. http://tfl.nu/rgb3
  Replies (2) Good night (734) Bad night (149) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.

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  (570): i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0. http://tfl.nu/r5hx
  Replies (2) Good night (244) Bad night (524) Order T-Shirt

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