'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
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She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
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The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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