Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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