They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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