I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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