I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize