Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
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I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
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BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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