u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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