My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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