I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
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you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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