I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
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There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
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He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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