Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize