I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
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She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
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Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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