I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
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