Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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