He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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