my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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