I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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