Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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