Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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