i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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