The maid of honor just puked.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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