I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize