I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
She even gives head with a lisp.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize