Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
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