you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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