My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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