having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
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I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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