i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
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today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
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He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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