PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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