as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize