would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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