tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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