if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize