I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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