I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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