So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
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She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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