It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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