Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sarcasm needs its own font
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize