Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize