I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
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