No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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