I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize